2/17/10

There are no longer walls or doors in the passage of time. I am not walking down a hallway, but rather, swimming through a stream. My life simply seems to flow together now, with nothing to really lay anchor upon.

We were discussing the time phenomenon this morning. I told Jennifer and Hans that when I lay my head on my pillow at night, it seems that no time has passed since the night before, when I was in identical position. I am not going to bed after any day in particular, but after any day at all. Every event of going to bed blends with every other one, and every waking up leaks into every other waking up, like spilled milk on a level surface. Hans called it the closest to a groundhog day phenomenon we would ever experience, and it seems only minutes ago that he said it. And I remarked on the phenomenon with Jen today, and I mentioned that the walk home was one anonymous in a stack of many. But this evening Hans arrived with the lower half of a boar body hanging from his hand, its legs dripping blood on the sidewalk. He was holding a machete with the other hand and said, "pork chops tonight," and that is what I will grapple, to anchor today in time.